Filed under: living
After having it brought to my attention, I have spent a lot of time thinking about the idea of pursuing greatness here on Earth & pursuing greatness in the Kingdom of God. And honestly I’ve spent more time than I probably ought to have thinking about and comparing myself to people I know who definitely pursue greatness on Earth more than myself, of course this was in an effort to avoid really evaluating myself and seeing the truth of it all in my life…
This all came into view when I was reading in Matthew 6, specifically when Jesus is warning about fasting in verse 16.
“And when you fast, do not look gloom like the hypocrites, for they disfigure their faces that their fasting may be seen by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you fast, anoint your heard and wash your face, that your fasting may not be seen by others but by your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.” — Matthew 6:16-18
I had never once really actually thought about “they have received their reward”. For some reason this time it stuck out to me and really made me think. They have received their reward. Not, they will receive their reward. They HAVE. Which got me thinking, what have they received by fasting?… and the answer was obvious, the praise and glory of men. Maybe the admiration of men, or the approval of men, maybe even for their own temporary feeling of self-worth and affirmation. Which is when I promptly began thinking about other men and women I know who may or may not do things for the glory of men, or affirmation from others; as well as when I decided that they seek the ‘glory of men’ more than I do… ha, of course to belittle the reality that I struggle with this too.
Once I caught myself comparing me and others, I stopped, but then had to evaluate where this plays out in my life. And I really do struggle with it, but I hadn’t thought about it before and it certainly hadn’t ever thought about their being a difference between seeking greatness among men, and seeking greatness in the Father. Especially because it’s so easy to think that if I am admired in my Christian circles and influencing others in a Christian sub-culture than surely that’s what I should be doing. But sometimes even if that is the case, I am receiving the glory for being wonderful and Christian-y, when in reality I should be pursuing greatness in God.
I’m not sure if that completely makes sense, and I am still trying to understand. But I think when I say greatness in God, or greatness in his Kingdom I don’t mean being super-Christian with the über successful K-Life with tons of growth or pastor of a huge mega-church. But I mean greatness in God’s standards. Being a man after God’s own heart. Being a man pursuing absolute truth in Christ versus what is most popular or can make my ministry and success grow in the eyes of a community. I don’t want greatness that’s half American dream and half Jesus. I want all of the Jesus part. The greatness in God’s terms. And if that means a small ministry and a humble position of serving others, then wonderful. I don’t want to be anywhere else.
